Why whales have holes in their heads and women have tight vaginas

Kondole the Whale and the hole in his head

Kondole was a mean and rude man. One night, the performers during a ceremony needed someone to keep a fire going; Kondole was the only one with fire, and he hid in the bush. The men argued with him, and one got frustrated and threw a spear into Kondole's skull. All the men then turned into animals, including kangaroos, possums, fish and birds. Kondole became a whale and the hole in his head from the spear became his blowhole.

Thought to be the oldest continuously maintained cultural history on Earth (50,000 years or more), the Australian aboriginal Dreamtime explains the origins and culture of the land and of its people, but - call me crazy - but I don't believe it. I don't... I mean, it kinda makes sense but I really truly doubt it.

Eve and the too tight vagina

Recent Jewish mythology has an interesting story to explain why having a baby hurts so much. A women once lived naked with a man in a magical garden where life was carefree and naked. It was a busy life. It was the man's job to name every animal that existed. He started with Aardvark and kept making up thousands of funny names while she collected fruit for them to eat. One day an unnamed walking snake misconstrued the wishes of the god of the garden and tricked her into eating a naughty fruit.

The snake lost his legs and was forced to eat dust and the women was given extra nerve endings in her vagina and it was tightened it up so it would hurt like hell should a baby ever pass through it. Ironically, this made the act of copulation more enjoyable.
Meanwhile the bloke was cursed to tend to fields and work for a living... oh yeah, women had to work and slave at home for the man and listen to him complain about how much work he has to do.

The legless snakes lived happily ever after.

1 comment:

snakey said...

love it when you talk about the 'legless snake' so often - you could say its one of the obsessions of humankind. ?

Slip of the tongue....gives birth to a new mythogical virus - especially on the internet.