The First Page Of The Bible

They recently discovered a smaller scroll hidden in the cylinder of the first scroll of the ancient Biblical scriptures, believed to be the actual "first page" of the Bible. When deciphered, it read ...

Copyright © 300 B.C. God. All Rights Reserved.

First scrawling First-Sunrise-After-Stonehenge-Keystone-Is-Shadowed
300 B.C.

All beings, places and events depicted in this work are fictional, and any resemblance to actual beings, places and events past, present or future is purely coincidental.

WARNING: Some of the actions performed in this work are dangerous and should only be attempted by professionals familiar with the action in question.

NOTE: Those tiny points of light in the sky when it gets dark are called 'stars'. Some of them do blow up on occasion. In no way should this be construed as a sign that there is, beneath such an explosion, any form of saviour. Should such a misconstrual happen, the author will not be held responsible for the avalanche of arrogance, zeal, bigotry, humanocentricity and other vile acts which will surely follow the residents of the planet into time eternal until someone sees fit to erase the denizens of the world and let the author start over.

DSBN 0-000000-0000-1

Suggested retail: 1 sheep


Handsome B. Wonderful said...

You know, if they made a movie out of the Bible it would be a violent, sexist, racist movie to be sure.

By the way, you should check out my current post about the absurdities in the Bible: Bible Absurdities

There is a link to the website that goes through most of the Bible verse by verse. You might have seen this website before but if not I think you'll find it hilarious. So come on over. :)

Eek said...


I like the retail price lol.

Laughing out loud... nope, bad mood still there.