A simple message of hope... translated

This is a cheap blog post lifted from a forum I visit, but I thought it funny at the time. Laughing at someone elses expense... ah well, at least he spread some joy.

dear. stupid fellow

my. christ born for sinners ,

acording scripture All are sinners by birth

so, you must know you are a sinner

let you come near cross

and you pray to wash your =sins

His blood wash your sins

and you live in righteous

Gordon - Well... who can argue with that? No, I really mean it! I mean, who could argue with that, for Christ's sake? I can't... I don't know what it means!

MothandRust - It's a cheap shot at someone who obviously looks like they're struggling with English and reason, but I'll see if I can translate. Afterall, I've spent most of my life speaking in tongues regularly, so translation of nonsense is second nature to me:

dear. stupid fellow

Dear unenlightened and uneducated atheist scumbag fellow...

my. christ born for sinners ,

My anointed saviour, the son of the Super Sky Daddy, was born into this sinful earth to save your pitiful souls from death or eternal torture - whichever comes first.

acording scripture All are sinners by birth

According to my book of fairy-tales you were all born as scum sucking sinful pieces of worthless crap and were ignorantly sinning away before you even knew how to soil your diapers. Simply exiting your mother's womb was tantamount to rebelliousness and a superfluity of naughtiness.

so, you must know you are a sinner

Therefore, should it not be obvious to you that you are not worthy of this life you were given and are inherently evil and worthless? This you must surely know.

let you come near cross

Allow yourself to come hither to the metaphorical torture implement and capital punishment device that the ancient Romans used.

and you pray to wash your =sins

It is here you can meditate and petition this god of mine to wash away that mindset of yours that is unequivocally equal to sin and most definitely death and never-ending hellfire.

His blood wash your sins

His analogous spilt blood will actually make your sins cleaner, but don't mix your white sins with your red ones or you'll end up with pink underwear.

and you live in righteous

From then on you can pretend to be holy and righteous and my god will disregard all the scummy things you've done and will continue to turn a blind eye to if you promise to keep asking forgiveness for them.

2 comments:

tina FCD said...

I rather liked that.(smile)

Anonymous said...

That was one of the funniest things I have read in a long time. Hilarious. Check out my blog if you get a chance. It's kinda anti-christian also... just not this bad yet... hahahaha!! "Super Sky Daddy"!! Hilarious!!